You know that feeling of being watched? Like when you’re walking through a crowded room—even though you’re blending in with everyone else, it still feels like all eyes are on you. Or maybe you’re sitting on the train reading a book, but you can’t shake the urge to look up and check if people are staring at you. The sensation is deeply unsettling, often causing anxiety, paranoia or making you hyper-aware of your surroundings. However, it’s important to understand that this perception isn’t always grounded in reality.
Our brains have a built-in expectation for where others are looking. If you experience social anxiety, body dysmorphia, OCD or other mental health conditions, or you have a fear of being judged, you might assume people are looking at your insecurities. And while most of the time people are too busy with their own thoughts to notice whatever you’re anxious about, it’s true that sometimes people stare. It’s rude, it’s annoying, but fortunately, it’s not a common occurrence.
However, the persistent fear of being watched, also known as scopophobia, is a condition that goes beyond being self-conscious to inducing full-on panic. To better understand this issue, and how it can be managed, let’s learn more about scopophobia and its related issues.
Are people actually watching me? Understanding the spotlight effect
The unsettling feeling of being watched can be explained by the spotlight effect, a mental bias that makes us overestimate how much attention others are giving us, leading to a heightened sense of self-awareness.
This exaggerated sense of being observed is even more intense for those with social anxiety. Taylor Newendorp, MA, LCPC, explains, “Usually when people are describing feelings or concerns like this, it’s out of fear that others are evaluating them negatively or thinking something critical. It’s not actually true that everyone’s staring, but the person is hyper-aware of anyone looking at them and interprets it as staring.” This can turn everyday situations like walking down the street or using public transportation into sources of intense discomfort.
The more self-conscious people are, the more likely they are to cling to self-biased thoughts instead of assessing the reality of a situation. For example, imagine a person with a rash on their face—breaking out has made them feel deeply embarrassed and ashamed. Because of their inner bias, they assume everyone around them feels the same way. When they overhear people laughing, they think they are being made fun of, even though the laughter is about something completely unrelated.
Recognizing the spotlight effect can be empowering. It helps remind us that most people aren’t paying nearly as much attention to us as we think, and we’re not alone in feeling like we’re sometimes in the spotlight. Taking a wider perspective can ease the pressure and anxiety you feel, allowing you to navigate social situations with more ease and confidence.
Is my fear of being watched linked to mental health?
Many mental health conditions can amplify the fear of being watched or judged by others, making social interactions feel overwhelming and intimidating. Scopophobia can be an indicator of another mental health issue, which can cause you to misinterpret everyday situations and believe you are the constant focus of negative attention.
Here are the key mental health conditions that can contribute to the fear of being watched, and how they manifest in daily life.
Social anxiety and the fear of being judged
Social anxiety is a very common mental health condition that can involve the feeling of being stared at. People with social anxiety disorder often experience an exaggerated fear that others are constantly judging them, leading to feelings of intense self-consciousness. These fears are usually based on the individual’s own insecurities and worries. For someone who is constantly wondering why they’re being stared at, everyday situations like walking into a room, breathing too loud, or even eating in public can trigger overwhelming anxiety.
According to the Anxiety and Depression Association of America, 15 million American adults experience social anxiety disorder, making it the second most common anxiety disorder in the US.
“People with social anxiety often misinterpret neutral glances as judgmental stares,” explains Newendorp. “They think, ‘Why are they looking at me? Do I look weird? Are they judging me?’ when, in reality, most people are focused on themselves.” This constant fear of being negatively evaluated can make daily life incredibly challenging.
Newendorp explains that one of the main issues that comes up with social anxiety is avoidance. “Over time, people are so afraid of interacting with others and so afraid of what other people might think of them that it feels safer and easier to just avoid interactions as much as possible.” A negative side effect of avoidance is loneliness and isolation, which can lead to depression.
People with social anxiety often misinterpret neutral glances as judgmental stares. They think, ‘Why are they looking at me? Do I look weird? Are they judging me?’ when, in reality, most people are focused on themselves.
Taylor Newendorp, MA, LCPC
In terms of treatment, exposure and response prevention (ERP) is very effective for social anxiety. ERP is an evidence-based treatment primarily used for obsessive compulsive disorder (OCD) and anxiety disorders. ERP works by gradually exposing individuals to the thoughts, situations, or stimuli that trigger their anxiety or fears, while preventing them from performing their usual compulsive behaviors or avoidance strategies. Over time, this exposure reduces the distress associated with these fears and helps break the cycle of compulsive behavior.
Newendorp explains what ERP might look like for someone with social anxiety, specifically with a fear of being stared at. “We would encourage you to very gradually take small steps over time, like interacting with other people just a little bit more to see if your fears come true.” He went on to explain that the vast majority of the time, people’s fears don’t come true, meaning they push themselves to interact with others, even make eye contact with other people, and they start to learn that others are not automatically being critical of them.
Scopophobia: the fear of being watched
Scopophobia is a form of phobia where individuals have an intense, irrational fear of being stared at or watched. While similar to social anxiety, scopophobia focuses specifically on the fear of being looked at rather than a broader fear of social judgment. People with scopophobia might avoid public spaces, large gatherings, or any situation where they believe they will be the center of attention. Scopophobia can be developed on its own or in relation to social anxiety.
This fear can be so debilitating that individuals may alter their daily routines or avoid places they would otherwise enjoy. As Newendorp explains, “Some people who are afraid of being looked at may even avoid making eye contact altogether, just so they don’t have to face the possibility of someone staring at them.”
If you think you have scopophobia, it is important to talk to a therapist to learn about the best treatment option for you based on your mental health history. Just like social anxiety disorder, exposure and response prevention therapy can be used to manage and alleviate symptoms. For scopophobia, ERP works gradually introducing you to situations where you feel like you’re being watched and helping you build tolerance and reduce your anxiety over time.
Rumination and OCD: constantly checking if others are watching
If you have obsessive compulsive disorder (OCD), especially if you’re prone to rumination, worrying about everyone staring at you can become an obsession.
OCD is a mental condition where unwanted, distressing thoughts can turn into obsessions. In order to get rid of the distress, individuals partake in repetitive actions or mental rituals (known as compulsions) to try and quickly remove the distress caused by obsessions. These compulsions offer temporary relief and often cause people to find themselves stuck in a cycle of having obsessive thoughts and being unable to truly ever get rid of them.
If you have OCD, you may find yourself repeatedly checking whether others are watching you. Newendorp describes this experience: “People with OCD might ask themselves, ‘Is that person staring at me? Do they know what I’m thinking?’ and they’ll check repeatedly to see if others are looking at them, which only reinforces their anxiety.” This hyper-awareness can make normal social interactions feel unbearable. It may also result in an avoidance compulsion, where you feel too afraid to make eye contact with others.
ERP therapy is particularly effective for individuals who experience OCD and intrusive thoughts. By gradually exposing you to your fears without allowing you to perform compulsions (such as checking), ERP helps you break the cycle of obsessive thinking and build resilience in the face of uncertainty
People with OCD might ask themselves, ‘Is that person staring at me? Do they know what I’m thinking?’ and they’ll check repeatedly to see if others are looking at them, which only reinforces their anxiety.
Taylore Newendorp, MA, LCPC
“A lot of time, people get caught up in their own minds, making these negative assumptions,” Newendorp says. Take, for example, the intrusive thought that everyone is always staring at you. Using ERP, a therapist would look at the behaviors you engage in when you’re preoccupied with this obsession. Then they’d work with you to build a strategy to resist these compulsions in the future. “By changing those behaviors, you start to see that those fears aren’t true. You realize you’re blowing it way out of proportion,” Newendorp explains.
Body image and self-perception
Body image issues and low self-esteem can also increase the feeling of being stared at or judged by the people around you. Being self-conscious about your appearance can make you think that others are aware of the same flaws that you see. This overthinking and anxiety about yourself can manifest into a constant feeling of being observed, making situations feel more uncomfortable than they actually are. For example, if you’re already insecure about how you look, a casual glance from someone might make you think they are analyzing your body and anything that could possibly be wrong with it.
These feelings are often amplified by societal pressures that promote unrealistic beauty standards. From advertisements to social media, we’re constantly exposed to messages about how we should and shouldn’t look. Most of the time these standards are not even naturally achievable. This constant fixture on selling us products to look different and better leads to internalized insecurities. In turn, we think others also notice our insecurities, reinforcing the idea that everyone is judging how we look. As Newendorp mentions, “People who are hyper-aware of their appearance or flaws may feel like everyone is staring at them, even when they’re not.”
Body image concerns can be linked to eating disorders, disordered eating, a preoccupation with calories and exercise, as well as intense feelings of shame, guilt, and judgment. Individuals with eating disorders may have a low sense of self-worth because of how they perceive their physical appearance. As a result, they might feel like every time they interact with someone, all the other person is doing is looking at them and judging them.
If you believe you have an eating disorder, or are showing signs and symptoms of disordered eating, it’s important to seek help. A therapist specializing in eating disorders can help you recover both mentally and physically.
Bottom line
The reality is, most of the time, people aren’t actually paying that much attention to us. That being said, having this knowledge doesn’t always make the feeling of being stared at any less frightening, especially if you have social anxiety or a fear of being judged.
If the persistent feeling that others are staring at you is causing significant distress, it’s a good idea to seek help. By talking to a therapist, you can figure out why you feel like you’re being stared at, and find ways to manage and alleviate the discomfort of the spotlight effect.
