You may have landed here because you Googled something along the lines of How to know if you have repressed memories? out of concern you have some hidden trauma. As innocent as most memories are, there are also darker, more traumatic memories that some of us would probably like to forget. Plus, memories are always uncertain to some degree, which can lead to worry and distress about what did or didn’t happen.
Repressed memories involve the idea that some people have experienced such severe trauma that their brain has buried these events as a form of protection. However, there are a lot of nuances to the science behind memory and trauma, including the controversial history of false memory syndrome, and certain serious mental health conditions like PTSD and False Memory/Real Event OCD.
Here’s a look into repressed memories, including their origin, their connection to trauma, and how you can get help if you’re concerned about your memory of severely negative events.
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What are repressed memories?
Repressed memories, or dissociative amnesia, are “memories of something so traumatic that our brain may have repressed it so that it wouldn’t come out again and, therefore, won’t bother us,” says Patrick McGrath, PhD, psychologist and Chief Clinical Officer at NOCD.
The phenomenon dates back to the late 1800s when psychologist Sigmund Freud developed the idea of memory repression after his teacher told him about a patient experiencing unexplainable symptoms. To cure these symptoms, her therapist performed various techniques that helped her remember traumatic events that she’d forgotten. Once she regained and discussed those memories, she saw an improvement in her symptoms.
Ultimately, Freud understood memory repression as a defense mechanism to block or minimize negative memories in the conscious mind.
Controversies surrounding repressed memories
Discussions about repressed memories saw a resurgence in the 1990s, as many adults began to tell their therapists about memories of childhood abuse that they hadn’t previously been aware of. Many of these therapists were using techniques like guided imagery, hypnosis, and age regression (which are considered highly ineffective) to recover or “unlock” traumatic memories in their patients.
Unfortunately, using these techniques to “treat” repressed memories often operates by the power of suggestion, which means that false memories can be created about events that never actually happened, leading to something unofficially termed “false memory syndrome.” According to the American Psychological Association (APA), false memory syndrome involves recollecting a repressed memory, such as childhood abuse, that never actually happened.
On an episode of This American Life podcast, a story was shared about a patient who sought therapy to address emotional distress. Their therapist suggested that the stress was due to a history of child abuse. Although the patient refuted those claims, the therapist reassured them that it was true and that they were “obviously repressing those memories of abuse.”
Tracie Zinman-Ibrahim, LMFT, CST, a therapist and the Chief Compliance Officer at NOCD, shares her experience with the power of suggestion and false memory.
“When my parents divorced when I was a child, my mom made a comment about my dad that I thought was weird. I then brought it up to my therapist, who assumed there was repressed sexual abuse trauma involved. I was like, ‘Nope, that’s not it,’ but she kept saying that I have repressed memories I don’t remember and that we need to discuss them to resolve them. “That led to an unjustified investigation of my father.”
This situation ultimately caused some discomfort and lifelong issues with Zinman-Ibrahim’s family because her therapist used the power of suggestion to sway her to “confess” to sexual abuse. “If your therapist is trying to find ways to ‘unlock’ repressed memories, I would recommend advocating for a different approach,” Zinman-Ibrahim suggests. “I say this because there are simply no ways to unlock memories that are agreed upon or effective. Most of the time, trying to do so just makes people more scared and confused. It’s easy to spiral out of control.”
There are simply no ways to unlock memories that are agreed upon or effective. Most of the time, trying to do so just makes people more scared and confused. It’s easy to spiral out of control.
Another issue with repressed memories is that scientists and medical professionals still have a lot to understand about how memories work. “We don’t always have access to absolutely everything that our brains have encoded at all times,” says Dr. McGrath. “Or, sometimes, certain pathways just seem to fade away. We still don’t know how we store memory and why it makes sense, from an evolutionary standpoint, to have stored memories.”
Are repressed memories real?
Memories are always fairly uncertain, but according to Zinman-Ibrahim, some people can have repressed memories, particularly highly traumatic ones. “People have a subconscious and a conscious mind, and sometimes their brains can go into a protective mode when too much is coming in that’s too much to deal with,” she says. “It can happen with various forms of abuse—especially when you’re a kid and can’t process what’s going on.”
However, it’s also important to note that while trauma can mess with memory in some ways, repressing memories entirely is still a phenomenon without much evidence to support it. “It’s still a debate as to whether you can even have psychological trauma lead to an entire blockage of memories,” says Zinman-Ibrahim. “That’s not even verified as a possibility yet.”
However, it’s important to acknowledge that if you have traumatic or intensely negative memories, they can feel especially uncertain, and it’s common to doubt whether your memories are real or accurate.
Can trauma lead to repressed memories?
According to Dr. McGrath, there’s the idea that trauma is repressed to help a person live their life. “If the trauma is not repressed, they would be too hard to handle,” he says.
It’s important to note that not all traumas are the same and can range in severity. “Everybody has trauma of some sort or another,” says Zinman-Ibrahim. “Maybe you got teased in school or have horrible parents. Sometimes, the trauma is really bad, and you remember. Sometimes, it happens, and maybe you get flashbacks because you have PTSD, and those things are still haunting you.”
However, Zinman-Ibrahim notes that discussing repressed memories is not necessarily beneficial for healing from trauma. “If you have a repressed memory, there’s nothing to talk about,” she says. “That’s the most important thing to realize, and you can still heal from it moving forward.”
Other mental health issues related to repressed memories
Aside from trauma, several other mental health conditions can be tied to this idea of repressed memories.
Complex post-traumatic stress disorder (CPTSD).
Complex post-traumatic stress disorder (CPTSD) can develop from experiencing chronic (or long-term) trauma from prolonged child abuse or domestic violence. A small study discovered that people with a history of childhood abuse and current PTSD could have trauma-related dissociation—which could be tied to uncertain memories.
False Memory OCD doesn’t have to rule your life
False Memory/Real Event OCD
Obsessive-compulsive disorder (OCD) is a treatable mental health condition in which certain situations trigger intrusive thoughts, images, urges, or feelings—known as obsessions. To cope with the distress from their obsessions, people engage in compulsions, which are repetitive physical or mental behaviors that provide temporary relief, but ultimately reinforce a vicious cycle of OCD symptoms.
False Memory/Real Event OCD is a subtype of OCD in which obsessions are focused on the accuracy of a person’s memory. “We know that an event happened, but we don’t remember everything about the event,” says Dr. McGrath. “What if we did something terrible but repressed it so that we don’t remember that we did the awful thing?” To deal with this uncertainty of your memories, you might do compulsive behaviors like mentally reviewing events (such as replaying past conversations), reassurance-seeking, thought suppression, and avoidance.
Chances are, if you have False Memory/Real Event OCD, you’re not repressing any memories, and you can learn to manage your worries and accept uncertainty with specialized treatment.
Can I recover repressed memories?
Are you able to learn how to remember repressed memories? Well, not exactly. “If you truly have repressed memories, there would not be a way for you to unlock them,” Zinman-Ibrahim says. “That’s just part of the uncertainty of life.”
But if you do believe you have repressed memories and intend to find your “hidden trauma,” it could ultimately lead to false memories. “If you go in trying to unlock something, you’ll probably unlock a false memory, and then you’ll go down a path of trying to solve a problem that doesn’t exist,” says Zinman-Ibrahim.
Treatment for mental health issues related to repressed memories
If you still suspect you have repressed memories, know that there’s no actual treatment to “unlock” your memories. “We don’t treat repressed memories because they’re repressed, and therefore, we wouldn’t know what they are,” says Zinmam-Ibrahim.
Rather than addressing the repressed memories, it’s best to treat the mental health conditions associated with them. Getting specialized treatment can help you learn to live with the uncertainty that memories can bring.
Here are some evidence-based ways you can treat mental health conditions tied to repressed or uncertain memories:
- Trauma therapy. Zinman-Ibrahim recommends working with a therapist specializing in trauma. “If you have a lot of trauma in your life, go to a trauma therapist to work on the trauma that you do remember,” she says.
- Prolonged exposure therapy. Prolonged exposure (PE) therapy can help people with CPTSD or PTSD, notes Zinmnan-Ibrahim. PE is a type of psychotherapy in which patients are gradually exposed to trauma-related memories, situations, and feelings in a safe setting, and, over time, they learn that they aren’t dangerous and don’t need to be avoided.
- Exposure and Response Prevention (ERP) therapy. False Memory/Real Event OCD can be managed with exposure and response prevention (ERP) therapy. This specialized form of therapy therapy is the gold standard for all OCD subtypes, and works by guiding you to gradually confront situations that trigger your uncertainty, then resist engaging in compulsions that make your fears worse. According to Zinman-Ibrahim, an ERP therapy session can involve “sitting in the uncertainty as to whether or not we have repressed memories.” If you stick with ERP and do your therapy homework, you could see improvements in your OCD within two months.